40 days...

I’m a big eater. I love food. I love food so much that I tend to overeat and make myself sick. However, I consider myself a very healthy eater. I know too much to eat crap food all day everyday. I read each nutrition label before I buy or eat food. I snack on fruit or veggies when I feel that urge for something sweet. Even though I know too much to eat crap food everyday it would seem like I know nothing about nutrition on the weekends. Weekends are hard for me. We always have a frozen pizza in the freezer (a good frozen pizza, not the $.99 any ingredient flies kind) or if we’re feeling rich we’ll go out to eat. When I do that I get whatever I want…big ol’ fat hamburger and fries, milkshake, Greek food, anything greasy and bad for me! Greasy = very sick Jessica.

All of this brings me to Lent. 40 days of preparation for Christ’s resurrection. I’m not Catholic. I am an active member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. My Dad’s side of the family is Catholic as well as some of my very good friends. Many of my family members and friends participate in Lent. Of course they know all the “rules” that go along with Lent, but I will only be following a couple (again, I’m not Catholic; I’m just doing this for me). First item on my Lent list is no overeating. I tend to forget that I am in control. There are many times that my stomach is telling my brain that I’m satisfied, but I stuff in a few more bites, and in return, pain. Now I’m not going to be one of those nutrition people that take the fun out of going out to eat and never eat another French fry again (that’s just punishment). Instead I’m going to sustain 40 days from these foods and then introduce them very slowly and on occasion into my diet. Portion size is also part of this Lent item. Smaller sizes make for a happier and healthier me. I will also sustain from meat on Fridays. This is a Lent rule that I figure would be fairly easy for me to follow because I rarely eat meat. I am a fan of vegetarian “meat” products. I’m still getting my protein, just not all the fat…awesome! Fish is exempt from this rule which is great for me because I’m a big fish eater.

So what do I want to get from my 40 days of Lent…the reward of health (yes very lame, but to me very important and very worth 40 days).

Definitely Not A Luxury Vehicle

No doors, no windshield, no cup holders, no A/C, no airbags...

I don't understand the appeal of this hobby Gordon and his friends have of spending thousands and thousands of dollars to build a truck just to destroy it. Boys are strange.

We Missed You!

A "Hillbilly Weekend" is all I have heard about for the past few weeks. Gordon's best friend lives in St. George. He has been wanting to take a weekend to go visit him for quite some time so when his friend Rick called and wanted to plan a trip down to see him he was ecstatic!

Gordon is far from a hillbilly (or at least I hope he is). However, some of his hobbies are not. He loves to go wheelin' in Toys (and by Toys I mean Toyotas). He also just bought his first gun which goes great with his concealed weapons permit he got awhile back. This weekend was full of both of those hobbies...wheelin' and shootin'.

Whenever I talked to him this weekend his voice was full of excitement. He needed some time to enjoy life. He's been so busy with working two jobs, home improvements, and taking care of me and dogs that he needed some time for himself.

I did miss him terribly. I always do when he leaves. I also always seem to keep myself very busy while he's gone too. I started on a very big project this weekend...painting my house! Lucky for me I have a great mom and sister that pitched in some time to help! I'm pretty sure I would still be painting my living room right now without them. I still have A LOT left to do, but what I have done I love! It's amazing what a little color can do to a white house.

In between the mix of my project I was able to go to dinner a couple of times with my family to celebrate the big birthday that was coming up. Skyler had not 1, not 2, not 3, but 4 birthday celebrations in his honor. What a spoiled turd. My favorite celebration was Friday night with dinner at Prairie Schooner. Only my parents had been there so we were all excited to pretend we were pioneers and eat in a covered wagon. The food was stupendous! The birthday boy got to order whatever he wanted so he got steak and lobster. Did I say he was spoiled?! He never fails to order the most expensive thing on the menu.

Along with home improvements and parties, I did something I never thought I would do. I stayed at my house alone! Whenever Gordon has been gone in the past I have either stayed at my mom's or had someone stay with me. Maybe it's because our apartment was in the ghetto, but I wasn't scared to stay by myself this time. I had the dogs for protection (haha) and a movie to cry myself to sleep with (watching P.S. I love you was not a great idea...especially because I hadn't heard from Gordon to tell me if he had made there safely, but in the middle of the movie he called). I can't give myself too much credit though. Last night I stayed at my mom's but only because we watched a movie and it was really late when it was over (and a little bit because I didn't want to go home to a dark house). I still impressed myself and Gordon.

Well Gordon, I'm glad you are on your way home right now. We missed you very much...especially Briggs. He has been moping around all weekend. He stares out the windows in anticipation that any car or person that is outside is you. I caught him laying on your shorts staring out the window. I don't know who will be more excited to see you, him or me! Let's say me...I love you!

Thirteen Candles

It finally happened...Skyler turned '13' today. It's a day that his mom, my mom, and I have dreaded since he was born. It's all starting...the girls, the coolness of only your friends not your family, caring what you look like, and physical changes...we have all been there (maybe not all of us were girl crazy, but I sure was boy crazy). Becoming a teenager is one of life's most exciting times, or at least that's what you think when you become one.

I'm excited for all the experiences and opportunities ahead of Skyler. I'm also very nervous for them too. He continues to be a gentleman. He also continues to become more handsome. That's what makes me nervous. The girls loves him. And he loves the girls. Scary!

He has great friends. We all know that friends make or break you. He's been very fortunate to have chosen to make friends with boys that are good boys. They include him in a lot of activities that otherwise he would not be able to participate in such as mutual every Wednesday night, and boyscout camp outs. They all seem to have the same standards. That's very important.

So as I tear up at the thought of what's to come I know that he will make correct decisions and become the young man he's suppose to be.

Happy Birthday to a strong spirited, smarty pants, football star, fun-loving THIRTEEN year old boy! I love you very much!

Putting Wal-mart Out Of Business One Coupon At A Time!

I consider myself a bargain shopper. I rarely buy anything unless it is on sale. So when my mother-in-law invited me to go to an activity her Relief Society was putting on about how to use coupons I couldn’t pass. I have heard about these classes and how people that incorporate what’s taught pay $1.00 for groceries that should have cost them $200+. Although skeptical, I went in with an open mind and willingness to at least try it.

During the class the gal that taught it had receipts that showed her paying under $5 for items that totaled much, much more than that. She also had a table full of items she had just purchased that week which included items she received for free or was getting money back for buying. You would think that would have been the selling point, HOWEVER for me it was a comment made by someone who has done the coupon thing faithfully. She said “I don’t even shop at Wal-mart anymore! I get better deals by using my coupons. They make Wal-mart’s prices look expensive!” I HATE Wal-mart! I do not shop there. I will do everything I can to stay away from that store and get others to do the same. In college I even did a report on how evil Wal-mart is. I suppose I know too much to shop there.

I've began to share the coupon concept with others. Wal-mart shopper or not, saving money is a wonderful thing.

"The Best Is Yet To Come"

Our ward is such an awesome ward. The members are one of a kind. I never thought I would say this but I don't like it when we miss because I feel like I'm going to miss out on something I need in my life. We missed last Sunday because of a water issue and I felt that throughout my week. We'll be missing this Sunday because our nephew is being blessed. But I won't feel it as much as I did last week because of one relief society teacher's efforts to get make the sister's more involved in her lessons.

Michelle Trujillo is a wonderful relief society teacher. You can tell that each lesson she teaches has been prepared with a lot of praying and studying done on her part. When it's her turn to teach she sends out an email to all of the sisters in the relief society telling us what ensign talk the lesson will be on and shares a thought. Most of the time I will prepare myself. This week she sent out the email. Knowing I wasn't going to be there this Sunday I made that much more of an effort to read and study the talk. I just finished this morning. I know that Michelle and Bishop Prete are working with the Spirit because this talk was meant specifically for me.

"Let Him Do It with Simplicity" by Elder L. Tom Perry is the talk this weeks lesson is on. Michelle summarized the talk perfectly in her email. "Elder Perry talks about how simplifying our lives can help us obtain relief from the stresses of life. He talks about the four basic needs of life (that David Thoreau came up with), as well as the spiritual benefits of a simplified lifestyle."

Right now the economy is scary. In some way or another the economy effects you. Only recently am I feeling the effects. For the past few months Gordon's job has been on shaking ground. He's in sales. People aren't spending money quite as much as they use to. They have laid off 8 of their sales staff and currently only have 4 on the sales team. Fortunately enough Gordon is one of the four. He just graduated last month. Not more than 6 months ago we were talking about all of the different jobs that he could apply for once he was finished. Those jobs are not there anymore. Don't get me wrong, there are jobs out there that he can apply for and most likely get, but none of them are his 'out of school career' job he dreamed of. We're bummed and worried.

I work for the state. State budgets are being cut. I thought I wouldn't be effected by the economy so much because I worked for the state (I don't know why I thought this OK). Wrong. The programs I work for as a health educator are under legislature to be cut and if they get cut I could get cut too.

We just bought a house. Enough said about that.

Elder L. Tom Perry's talk helped ease my worries. Although a lot of what he said is hard to do, I know Gordon and I have to do it, more specifically I know I have to do it. I know that life gets crazy. I let the stress and anxiety get the best of me when instead I should "endure the varied seasons of life while remaining positive, even optimistic." I will be a person of faith and hope because like Elder Perry said I know "beyond the shadow of any doubt that the gospel of Jesus Christ is true and the best is yet to come."

Some specifics of his talk that I will apply into my life are the ideas Elder Perry had from Henry David Thoreau. We have four basic needs of life: food, clothing, shelter, and fuel. I feel like I do pretty well in the food department. I eat foods that are nutritious, I exercise regularly, and get enough sleep. I also feel very blessed because of those decisions. His talk helped me remember the importance of those things.

Clothing is another need and an issue I have. I am modest. That's not my issue. I love fashion and I love shopping. I have cut way back since I've been married on the shopping. And now I know I have to pretty much eliminate it (not because of the talk but because of our situation). I know I will not lack...I have a lot of clothes. And I am really hoping that I don't have to eliminate it for the rest of my life. But I should not focus so much on what's in and what's out. Just buy what I need (need being the key word).

Our shelter is nothing fancy. When we bought our house we knew our budget and didn't go over it. I feel pretty good about that. The only debt we have is our home and cars. But Elder Perry said "We should practice and increase our habits of thrift, industry, economy, and frugality. Members of a well-managed family do not pay interest; they earn it." I can feel at ease practicing and increasing those habits. I'll start today when I go grocery shopping.

Spiritual fuel is something I can always work on. I struggle with one very major aspect and that is "surrendering our will to the will of the Lord." I love to be in control. My faith is being tested right now. This talk helped me remember to do my part and let the Lord do the rest. I'm working on it.

Once again Gordon is my rock. I had a break down a few days ago. I let the stress and anxiety have the best of me. He held me and told me that we are doing our part and we pay our tithing and everything is going to be ok. I know he's stressed but he has not once broke down. He has a lot of faith in the Lord. I am so blessed to have him as my husband. I'm sure I learn by his example more than he learns from mine.

I'm taking Elder Perry's talk and applying it in my life. I want to "experience the spiritual benefits of a simplified lifestyle."

A Working Man

My brother has had his struggles but right now he's has started a new beginning (again). Let me give you a brief update. Before the holidays last year he found himself once again in jail. He was there for a reoccurring violation and was not up for bail. He was given the opportunity to go in front of a judge and plead his case. This trial was different that previous trials he had been apart of. The decision of jail or prison would be decided. My brother has been to jail many times. Prison never. He was scared. We were all scared. But he got a brake once again. The judge decided to sentence him with jail time. He would serve in a halfway house where he would pay rent, get work release, and answer to someone multiple times a day. His life is controlled by someone else rather than him. It's perfect. That's what he needs. I only wish it would last forever!

He's doing amazing right now. He's very charismatic and landed himself a job. Not very many employers want to hire someone that is currently in jail. There are many people that are looking for jobs these days. But he's a sweet talker. He works for a pizza place as a cashier, server, bus boy, and cook. He's amazing at it! He's one of the hardest workers I know. When he sets his mind to something he owns it! This job is not anything special by all means and I'm sure it's not hard to be great at, but he's more than great at it...he owns this job! So much that the owner wants to let go of some of the other staff and let him pick up their job and hours.

We went to visit last night and it was so great to see him succeeding. He's doing it! He doesn't have car so he bikes to work and gets there well before his shifts starts and stays well after his shift has ended. He makes tips on slow nights. My Mom and I watched him glow as the phones kept ringing and people kept coming in and he was working and doing it all.

I want him so bad to succeed. I hate that he struggles with addiction. I hate that he doesn't know what he could be. I hate that he doesn't remember the principles that he has been taught to know that he wouldn't be given this challenge if he couldn't overcome it. He can do this! And we'll be cheering him on all the way.