christmas time means lots of get togethers with our family. over the weekend we had two family christmas parties (and gordon's company christmas party). it's always fun getting together will extended family. you get a chance to catch up and see each other one more time before the year ends. the burton family christmas party was a bit different this year than from year's past. we were missing one very important person...my grandma. she hadn't been feeling well and couldn't stand to be away and off of her oxygen for too long so she opted to stay home. when i was younger we use to have the family christmas parties at her house. i wish we could have done that. instead we had it at a church to fit all 80+ of us. it wasn't the same without her. a christmas tradition has always been that as we leave we get a christmas orange. my grandpa use to be the one to pass them out. he would give each and every one of us a hug and "grandpa kiss" (the slobbery kind that i miss oh so much) as he handed us our orange. my grandma took his place once he died. this year the oranges were passed out by other family members. it just wasn't the same and it gave me a glimpse of what's to come once my grandma does pass on and i didn't like it. don't get me wrong, my grandparent's posterity is made of some of the finest people, and as i spoke to my grandma after our party was over to tell her how strange it all was and how much i missed her she told me how proud she was of her posterity and loved each of us so much, but i don't want to have christmas parties without her. ever. not realistic, i know, but i need her there. it's just not the same without her.
she's currently in the hospital. turns out she has more fluid around her heart and lungs and she's in heart failure. none of this is new. she's been in heart failure for the past couple of years. however, the size of her heart has significantly increased. it's not looking good. she's fine, under great care, and is in no pain. but with her heart the size that it is the doctor says it's only a matter of time.
many prayers are constantly being said on my grandma's behalf and for that i am eternally grateful. it's those prayers that have kept her here as long as she has been. i know she's ready to be with my grandpa again. shoot, i am too i miss him so dang much. i love my grandma so much and know what ever happens next is what's meant to be.
it's just hard.
2 comments:
Sorry jessica. I miss both my grandma's, but it has been extra hard this year to not have my grandma Huber. Christmas is just not the same without her. Hang in there.
GOod Luck Jessica's - grandmas have a way of sticking in our hearts so strong that luckily, it's impossible to get them out but it pretty much sucks when they leave us on earth all by ourselves. It's a cruel twist of life because we never think (or want) them to ever leave us.
I love my grandmas. I miss my grandmas terribly.
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